This was Week One (of many "Week One's")...I've started and stopped so many times that I've lost count. The reason that this is a real Week One is that I'm actually organized!!! This makes it official; it makes it do-able.
Plus, with a first grader, you can't just teach phonics anymore!
Sharkbait, 1st grade:
Handwriting Without Tears - F/f, E/e, D/d, P/p (reviewing capitals, learning lower-case)
Phonics Pathways - sm, sn, st, sp, sc, sk
Right Start Math - quantities in twos, writing numbers, zero
Writing With Ease - complete sentences, narrations
SweetSong, K-4:
HWT and PP - A, E, I, O
RS - quantities of 1, 2, 3
Snuggie, Pre-K:
HWT - A
Mother Goose - The Alphabet; 1,2,3,4,5
Circle
Colors
We listened to eight chapters of Stuart Little from an audiobook.
I just received the activity guide for SOTW and can't wait to start history next week!
Friday, September 10, 2010
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
The Second Day
This second day went well, though I woke up at 4:30am because of one of my kids crying, needing to be re-covered with blankies...I dozed on and off until 7, when I heard the garage door open and closing, meaning that Hub left for work. The girls were still sleeping and Sharkbait was drawing quietly at the kitchen table. The girls didn't wake up until 8 or so, so we didn't get school started until 9:30ish. I decided not to freak out about that and found the morning fairly easy!
By the time Shark had to do math, the girls were antsy, so I sent them outside for the math lesson. I love that I can see them completely while sitting at the kitchen table. I was glad that they weren't even interested in the kiddie computer or video. This makes me want to re-organize our crafts and activities roller cart thingy, so they can just go at that whenever they're not doing one-on-one time with me.
Tomorrow will be interesting because we have the homeschool PE class from 11:30am to 1:30pm; the girls' dance class from 4:00 to 4:45pm; and my step aerobics class from 5:00 to 6:00pm.
We'll have to have a quick breakfast, an early start on school, a quick lunch (with snacks and water to-go), a solid quiet time, and a crockpot dinner!
By the time Shark had to do math, the girls were antsy, so I sent them outside for the math lesson. I love that I can see them completely while sitting at the kitchen table. I was glad that they weren't even interested in the kiddie computer or video. This makes me want to re-organize our crafts and activities roller cart thingy, so they can just go at that whenever they're not doing one-on-one time with me.
Tomorrow will be interesting because we have the homeschool PE class from 11:30am to 1:30pm; the girls' dance class from 4:00 to 4:45pm; and my step aerobics class from 5:00 to 6:00pm.
We'll have to have a quick breakfast, an early start on school, a quick lunch (with snacks and water to-go), a solid quiet time, and a crockpot dinner!
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
School Today
School went fairly smoothly today! I feel that the Lord was preparing me for this move and this school year. His hand of grace is all over it!
Our early morning is very relaxed. I take my time drinking my coffee outside while the kids play in our wonderful fenced-in backyard with its little patch of grass and lone tree. We come inside for breakfast and clean-up. Around 9 or so, we start school.
The morning is broken up into 30-minute segments. The first session I have one-on-one time with SweetSong. Sharkbait plays on our little kiddie computer and Snuggie watches Leap Frog videos. The second session, I spend with the Snug, while Sharkie is watching an educational video and Sweets is on the computer. We take 30 minutes for a snack and an audiobook. During the fourth segment, I do math with Sharkie and the girls switch the activities.
We listened to the first few chapters of Stuart Little on audiobook during snack today. I was pleasantly surprised at the kids' comprehension of the story's basic premise. I don't want to make our audiobooks a chore, so I'll just keep the questions to a minimum. It's mostly a time to enjoy a good story while eating our crackers :)
I got a load of laundry started during this time!
We ate lunch and the kids played until naptime. I think the kids are weaning themselves off of naptime. GASP! However, I'm going to keep them in separate rooms with toys, doors closed, and I know they'll most likely fall asleep!
I'm wondering when to do Language Arts with Sharkie...I had planned to do it with him at the beginning of quiet time/naptime. But the girls are still up and down, up and down. I may have to move his LA to after quiet time...I'm not sure yet. I think I'm going to keep on doing LA with him at the beginning of quiet time for the remainder of the week, taking time to train his sisters to stay in their assigned rooms, since LA is not too hard for him yet!
My plan is to do History Mondays after lunch and Science on Wednesdays.
Overall, it was a good morning. Now if I can just get those girls to stay in their rooms for quiet time...
:)
Our early morning is very relaxed. I take my time drinking my coffee outside while the kids play in our wonderful fenced-in backyard with its little patch of grass and lone tree. We come inside for breakfast and clean-up. Around 9 or so, we start school.
The morning is broken up into 30-minute segments. The first session I have one-on-one time with SweetSong. Sharkbait plays on our little kiddie computer and Snuggie watches Leap Frog videos. The second session, I spend with the Snug, while Sharkie is watching an educational video and Sweets is on the computer. We take 30 minutes for a snack and an audiobook. During the fourth segment, I do math with Sharkie and the girls switch the activities.
We listened to the first few chapters of Stuart Little on audiobook during snack today. I was pleasantly surprised at the kids' comprehension of the story's basic premise. I don't want to make our audiobooks a chore, so I'll just keep the questions to a minimum. It's mostly a time to enjoy a good story while eating our crackers :)
I got a load of laundry started during this time!
We ate lunch and the kids played until naptime. I think the kids are weaning themselves off of naptime. GASP! However, I'm going to keep them in separate rooms with toys, doors closed, and I know they'll most likely fall asleep!
I'm wondering when to do Language Arts with Sharkie...I had planned to do it with him at the beginning of quiet time/naptime. But the girls are still up and down, up and down. I may have to move his LA to after quiet time...I'm not sure yet. I think I'm going to keep on doing LA with him at the beginning of quiet time for the remainder of the week, taking time to train his sisters to stay in their assigned rooms, since LA is not too hard for him yet!
My plan is to do History Mondays after lunch and Science on Wednesdays.
Overall, it was a good morning. Now if I can just get those girls to stay in their rooms for quiet time...
:)
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Beginning the School Year
We did do two weeks of school in our temporary housing at the end of July, beginning of August, using those big all-in-one workbooks you get at your local superstore. We moved into our new house the second week in August and flew to my hometown for my sister's wedding the week after that. Coming back for the last week in August, we (almost) finished unpacking and getting settled.
But I see this week as the beginning of our school year.
I didn't order the last of my curriculum until the first week in September. Here we are entering the second week and it's time to get a'movin' on school!
This year, Sharkbait is in 1st grade. For him, we're using:
Handwriting Without Tears - lower-case letters
Phonics Pathways - already more than half-way through book
Right Start Math, Level A - starting in Lesson 13
First Language Lessons
Writing With Ease, I
SweetSong will do some K-4 work, including:
Handwriting Without Tears
Phonics Pathways
Right Start Math, Level A
Snuggie will be doing Pre-K stuff and we'll be using mostly Mother Goose and library books for her learning. She will use the wood blocks from HWT to get started on letter recognition and phonics.
With all three kids, we'll do one-day-a-week History (Story of the World, I) and Science. For science, we'll be using Usborne books as our starting point and library books as supplements.
It sounds like a lot to me, especially since we've signed the girls up for once-a-week dance class. Sharkbait is signed up for a homeschool PE class and I have two classes a week at the gym! I'm also going to be leading a book study for PWOC. Sharkbait has speech therapy and I still hope to make it out to library every Friday! Is it possible?
Probably.
I always struggle with perfection. I need to keep reminding myself:
1. These plans are not written in stone. Curriculum can be changed, classes can be changed. And that's okay.
2. Whatever gets done will benefit my children, our family, even if it's not done perfectly.
3. There are many others going through this or who have already gone through it. I just need to reach out when on the brink (or before I get to the brink) of insanity!
Ah, it's good to peptalk oneself once in a while. I feel a lot better about Tuesday, I'll tell you that much!
But I see this week as the beginning of our school year.
I didn't order the last of my curriculum until the first week in September. Here we are entering the second week and it's time to get a'movin' on school!
This year, Sharkbait is in 1st grade. For him, we're using:
Handwriting Without Tears - lower-case letters
Phonics Pathways - already more than half-way through book
Right Start Math, Level A - starting in Lesson 13
First Language Lessons
Writing With Ease, I
SweetSong will do some K-4 work, including:
Handwriting Without Tears
Phonics Pathways
Right Start Math, Level A
Snuggie will be doing Pre-K stuff and we'll be using mostly Mother Goose and library books for her learning. She will use the wood blocks from HWT to get started on letter recognition and phonics.
With all three kids, we'll do one-day-a-week History (Story of the World, I) and Science. For science, we'll be using Usborne books as our starting point and library books as supplements.
It sounds like a lot to me, especially since we've signed the girls up for once-a-week dance class. Sharkbait is signed up for a homeschool PE class and I have two classes a week at the gym! I'm also going to be leading a book study for PWOC. Sharkbait has speech therapy and I still hope to make it out to library every Friday! Is it possible?
Probably.
I always struggle with perfection. I need to keep reminding myself:
1. These plans are not written in stone. Curriculum can be changed, classes can be changed. And that's okay.
2. Whatever gets done will benefit my children, our family, even if it's not done perfectly.
3. There are many others going through this or who have already gone through it. I just need to reach out when on the brink (or before I get to the brink) of insanity!
Ah, it's good to peptalk oneself once in a while. I feel a lot better about Tuesday, I'll tell you that much!
It's Pathetic.
I know. It's pathetic. Just because we've moved across the country and did not have steady internet access for three months, that doesn't mean I should have neglected my blog.
Well, here I am, back online and brimming over with news!
We love our new house! It's so spacious! Four bedrooms means we have a guest room always available! Now, if we can only get our friends and family to fly or drive across the country to visit us...
Speaking of driving across the country...
We did it in four days. We crossed nine states in two vehicles. One was a little hybrid that, praise God, did not die going up and down the mountains of Colorado. Seriously, the only hybrids we saw in Colorado were abandoned on the side of the highways...We went 40-50 almost the whole way through the mountains, even though the speed limit was between 50-75 mph. Also interesting about driving through Colorado was the puking done by two of my kiddies in the mile-high city. I guess the change in the elevation and the heat got to them. They puked on and off the rest of the trip: in Walmart, in the van, in the hotel...
But it wasn't bad. Really!
I got pulled over in Arizona or Utah for tailgating my husband. I was definitely less than three car lengths behind him. The officer was really nice, though, and just told me to back off a little, for safety reasons. I agreed that it would be a good idea.
So, we're here now and mostly settled.
We've jumped into life here on base, getting involved in the chapel and the homeschool group. We pick up school again on Tuesday. This time all three kids will spend a little one-on-one time with me. It promises to be a busy, full, exciting time here! I can't wait to share it with you!
Well, here I am, back online and brimming over with news!
We love our new house! It's so spacious! Four bedrooms means we have a guest room always available! Now, if we can only get our friends and family to fly or drive across the country to visit us...
Speaking of driving across the country...
We did it in four days. We crossed nine states in two vehicles. One was a little hybrid that, praise God, did not die going up and down the mountains of Colorado. Seriously, the only hybrids we saw in Colorado were abandoned on the side of the highways...We went 40-50 almost the whole way through the mountains, even though the speed limit was between 50-75 mph. Also interesting about driving through Colorado was the puking done by two of my kiddies in the mile-high city. I guess the change in the elevation and the heat got to them. They puked on and off the rest of the trip: in Walmart, in the van, in the hotel...
But it wasn't bad. Really!
I got pulled over in Arizona or Utah for tailgating my husband. I was definitely less than three car lengths behind him. The officer was really nice, though, and just told me to back off a little, for safety reasons. I agreed that it would be a good idea.
So, we're here now and mostly settled.
We've jumped into life here on base, getting involved in the chapel and the homeschool group. We pick up school again on Tuesday. This time all three kids will spend a little one-on-one time with me. It promises to be a busy, full, exciting time here! I can't wait to share it with you!
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Spankings and Speedtraps
We have these great s-curves in our subdivision that remind me of the s-curves in the town I grew up in. I love going fast around s-curves.
Two nights ago I was heading to Walmart, flying around those curves (okay, so it was only 40mph, but it felt fast; these are sharp curves.)
I got pulled over right before I hit the road leading out of the subdivision.
Ack!
I haven't been pulled over in about a decade! And I've never gotten a ticket! But I could see no way out of this one.
The policeman was very nice. He asked me if I knew what the speed limit there was. I looked hopefully over my shoulder; maybe a sign was posted? But, no. So, I gave it my best shot: 25? He smiled and said, "Actually, no. It's 30, but you were going 40 around those curves." (I knew this; I always watch my spedometer; it's fun.)
He assured me he was not going to give me a ticket, as long as all the documentation was in order (it was). He gave me a pink piece of paper (carbon copy) that had *warning* *warning* written all over it. No need to show up in court, no fine, just a warning. Thank you, sir, I said gratefully.
As I pulled away, I had this crazy thought: I'm going fly around those curves again on my way home! And do you know what popped into my head right after that?
"Foolishness!"
I spank my kids when they disobey a rule and shake my head when I see them try the exact same offense two minutes later. Foolish child, I think mournfully. You'll only get another spanking, you know! But here I was, right after a spanking, contemplating breaking the rule again! Okay, I'm not going to be foolish. I'm not 3 anymore, sista!
Humbled. A bit ashamed. But not foolish!
Well, not completely foolish...here's the rest of the story...
"They" are going to build new houses in our subdivision. One of my neighbors wrote a petition, asking them to consider not bringing more people into our subdivision, since there's only one road in and out. Think of the increased traffic! We have speeding problems, as it is! Hub and I signed the petition; in fact, I think we were the first to do it. Our neighbor presented it to the city council and they accepted it. That's why they were cracking down on speeding in our subdivision. Hence, I was caught...is that ironic (and very embarrassing!) or what?
My neighbor thought it was funny.
Oh, well, live and learn :)
For a (an?) hilarious recounting of an encounter with a law-enforcement officer read this:
http://http//highmaintenanceaspirations.blogspot.com/2010/03/did-i-ever-tell-you-about-time.html
Two nights ago I was heading to Walmart, flying around those curves (okay, so it was only 40mph, but it felt fast; these are sharp curves.)
I got pulled over right before I hit the road leading out of the subdivision.
Ack!
I haven't been pulled over in about a decade! And I've never gotten a ticket! But I could see no way out of this one.
The policeman was very nice. He asked me if I knew what the speed limit there was. I looked hopefully over my shoulder; maybe a sign was posted? But, no. So, I gave it my best shot: 25? He smiled and said, "Actually, no. It's 30, but you were going 40 around those curves." (I knew this; I always watch my spedometer; it's fun.)
He assured me he was not going to give me a ticket, as long as all the documentation was in order (it was). He gave me a pink piece of paper (carbon copy) that had *warning* *warning* written all over it. No need to show up in court, no fine, just a warning. Thank you, sir, I said gratefully.
As I pulled away, I had this crazy thought: I'm going fly around those curves again on my way home! And do you know what popped into my head right after that?
"Foolishness!"
I spank my kids when they disobey a rule and shake my head when I see them try the exact same offense two minutes later. Foolish child, I think mournfully. You'll only get another spanking, you know! But here I was, right after a spanking, contemplating breaking the rule again! Okay, I'm not going to be foolish. I'm not 3 anymore, sista!
Humbled. A bit ashamed. But not foolish!
Well, not completely foolish...here's the rest of the story...
"They" are going to build new houses in our subdivision. One of my neighbors wrote a petition, asking them to consider not bringing more people into our subdivision, since there's only one road in and out. Think of the increased traffic! We have speeding problems, as it is! Hub and I signed the petition; in fact, I think we were the first to do it. Our neighbor presented it to the city council and they accepted it. That's why they were cracking down on speeding in our subdivision. Hence, I was caught...is that ironic (and very embarrassing!) or what?
My neighbor thought it was funny.
Oh, well, live and learn :)
For a (an?) hilarious recounting of an encounter with a law-enforcement officer read this:
http://http//highmaintenanceaspirations.blogspot.com/2010/03/did-i-ever-tell-you-about-time.html
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Why I'm Grateful
Just felt like thanking the Lord for these blessings!
1. SweetSong wanted to do Phonics. We've started and stopped a few times now. But this time, I have this weird feeling (resolve?) that it'll stick. She's starting Kindergarten!
2. A visiting friend gathered a bunch of us moms and kids at the Riverwalk on Tuesday for a picnic. SO GOOD!
3. Another friend outfitted my girls for a year or so...and this woman has good taste...her daughter had a growth spurt so these 3T clothes won't fit her...they'll fit my gals! Here's to hoping my girls don't grow, hehe :)
4. I've been able to think through what I've experienced/learned here...closure is good...helps with the transition of moving in a few months...
5. We're having penne with broccoli and beans tonight for dinner. YUM! Sounds boring, but it's good! It's those little things that make our day, isn't it?
:)
1. SweetSong wanted to do Phonics. We've started and stopped a few times now. But this time, I have this weird feeling (resolve?) that it'll stick. She's starting Kindergarten!
2. A visiting friend gathered a bunch of us moms and kids at the Riverwalk on Tuesday for a picnic. SO GOOD!
3. Another friend outfitted my girls for a year or so...and this woman has good taste...her daughter had a growth spurt so these 3T clothes won't fit her...they'll fit my gals! Here's to hoping my girls don't grow, hehe :)
4. I've been able to think through what I've experienced/learned here...closure is good...helps with the transition of moving in a few months...
5. We're having penne with broccoli and beans tonight for dinner. YUM! Sounds boring, but it's good! It's those little things that make our day, isn't it?
:)
Friday, March 19, 2010
A Sunshine Award
My first blog award! Thank you, Rebecca!I'm passing the award on to six blogs that make me smile, mostly because I know each woman who writes them. You all are just as beautiful and creative in person as in your blogs!
Here they are in alphabetical order:
To receive your award, save the award to your desktop, then paste it into a new post. Give the award, if you would like, to other blogs you enjoy by providing a link to them in the post and leaving a comment for them to receive it.
Hope your day is filled with sunshine!
Monday, March 15, 2010
Quick Update. No Pics.
The only "pic" I had today was when I "pic-ked" a pony bead out of Snuggie's nose with a chopstick! It was yellow. The bead, not the chopstick. Or the nose.
We're all getting over colds. We were out of the loop for so long due to a trip up north and our sickness that Sharkbait told his auntie he wishes he could go to school so he could see his friends! Ouch! Don't worry, little fella, we're going to get back into the swing of things this week. Does anyone else feel bad about infecting friends at Bible Study and Sunday School, but not feel bad about heading out to Walmart for painting supplies? Or is it just me?
So, we didn't go to our normal activities this weekend but did paint our blue wall in the master bedroom (it's "cozy neutral" now, to match the other three walls). We painted the master bathroom the same color: cozy, cozy neutral...mmmmm, I need a nap.
We also painted our little hallway between the kids' rooms the same color as our living room...what is it called? Cliveden leather? Um, how about light brown?
Our house is starting to shape up!
We're still "decluttering"...our garage looks like what our master bedroom used to look like.
It's hard to think that this house is sorta, kinda not ours anymore...we're preparing it, in a sense, for its new owners...sniff, sniff...
I hope the kids don't color on the walls anymore, especially with permanent markers.
Our sweet friend found out we were sick and offered to bring us chicken noodle soup. I was at the store, mind you, when she called, picking up a gallon of Cliveden leather-tinted paint. I was so blessed that I said, sure, chatting away with her, while the paint was being mixed. It didn't occur to me until about an hour before she was going to come over that we're not that sick. Snuggie was the first to get sick...then, SweetSong...then, Sharkbait and me...Hub's hanging on by a thread, trying not to get sick...it started with a day of headache, muscle ache, and low-grade fever...not a biggie...then, just a sore throat and some chest congestion/cough in the mornings...really, we were well enough to paint and play...and here was my friend, gearing up to bring us soup and Sprite! I called her, saying, hey, it's so sweet of you to offer, but we're really feeling okay! She laughed and insisted on bringing the meal over, saying, don't feel super, super bad about being a little sick...I smiled. I didn't feel super bad...just a little...foolish...
It was good soup.
I'll have to get some pictures up soon. Not of the soup. Of the house. And of Cliveden leather.
We're all getting over colds. We were out of the loop for so long due to a trip up north and our sickness that Sharkbait told his auntie he wishes he could go to school so he could see his friends! Ouch! Don't worry, little fella, we're going to get back into the swing of things this week. Does anyone else feel bad about infecting friends at Bible Study and Sunday School, but not feel bad about heading out to Walmart for painting supplies? Or is it just me?
So, we didn't go to our normal activities this weekend but did paint our blue wall in the master bedroom (it's "cozy neutral" now, to match the other three walls). We painted the master bathroom the same color: cozy, cozy neutral...mmmmm, I need a nap.
We also painted our little hallway between the kids' rooms the same color as our living room...what is it called? Cliveden leather? Um, how about light brown?
Our house is starting to shape up!
We're still "decluttering"...our garage looks like what our master bedroom used to look like.
It's hard to think that this house is sorta, kinda not ours anymore...we're preparing it, in a sense, for its new owners...sniff, sniff...
I hope the kids don't color on the walls anymore, especially with permanent markers.
Our sweet friend found out we were sick and offered to bring us chicken noodle soup. I was at the store, mind you, when she called, picking up a gallon of Cliveden leather-tinted paint. I was so blessed that I said, sure, chatting away with her, while the paint was being mixed. It didn't occur to me until about an hour before she was going to come over that we're not that sick. Snuggie was the first to get sick...then, SweetSong...then, Sharkbait and me...Hub's hanging on by a thread, trying not to get sick...it started with a day of headache, muscle ache, and low-grade fever...not a biggie...then, just a sore throat and some chest congestion/cough in the mornings...really, we were well enough to paint and play...and here was my friend, gearing up to bring us soup and Sprite! I called her, saying, hey, it's so sweet of you to offer, but we're really feeling okay! She laughed and insisted on bringing the meal over, saying, don't feel super, super bad about being a little sick...I smiled. I didn't feel super bad...just a little...foolish...
It was good soup.
I'll have to get some pictures up soon. Not of the soup. Of the house. And of Cliveden leather.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Inconsistent Intimacy
I love the moms' group at our church. We have so much to talk about and catch up on every (other) week, that we spend most of our meeting, uh, talking...and catching up! But the new study we've chosen is good, too.
It's called Train Up a Mom: a Bible Study for Mothers, by Vollie Sanders.
Yep, I need to get me some training to do this mommy thing.
This week's study was called "To Walk in Intimacy". Really, we know we need to have time with the Lord in order to mother our children in a way that glorifies Him. We get stuck when we can't figure out when...how...huh? We resolve to wake up before the kids or we determine to get some quiet time in after our kids are in bed...but something always comes up. Always.
It could be the kid who is getting sick and wakes early for comfort. It could be the coffee we gave the four-year old in the morning, still coursing through her veins at 8 at night! Hehe. It could be just plain ole fatigue or mental exhaustion...whatever it is, it prevents us from consistent time with God.
And that prevents us from seeking Him at all.
We read about Zacchaeus' determination to see who Jesus was in Luke 19:1-10. He had the odds stacked against him - he was short, bless his heart, and surrounded by a huge crowd - but he climbed that ole tree to get him a view of the Lord passing by. How excitedly he must have run, to run ahead of the crowd and to climb a tree. He welcomed the Lord Jesus into his home gladly...and his life was changed radically as a result.
My circumstances as a stay-at-home mom of three young children are not favorable for consistent intimate times with God. But I can seize any opportunity, like Zacchaeus seized that tree, to see the Lord. It might be during a car ride (when all three are strapped down!). Or when I'm washing dishes. I hope to have some quiet time during the day, but I don't need to condemn myself for the circumstances that might prevent it. The point is to go deep, in that moment, with God. To run excitedly, to expect great things. Whenever it happens.
And really, our goal is not to "make the Lord part of our lives". He is our Life. To separate our "time" with Him from the rest of our lives is silly. It's impossible. Either He is or He is not my Life. There are those intimate moments, sweet and refreshing; I need those to thrive. But it's dangerous to think that those intimate moments will sustain my life. Those inconsistent intimate moments are framed in my ever-increasing faith and my obedience to God, according to His consistent mercy and grace. To Him be the glory!
It's called Train Up a Mom: a Bible Study for Mothers, by Vollie Sanders.
Yep, I need to get me some training to do this mommy thing.
This week's study was called "To Walk in Intimacy". Really, we know we need to have time with the Lord in order to mother our children in a way that glorifies Him. We get stuck when we can't figure out when...how...huh? We resolve to wake up before the kids or we determine to get some quiet time in after our kids are in bed...but something always comes up. Always.
It could be the kid who is getting sick and wakes early for comfort. It could be the coffee we gave the four-year old in the morning, still coursing through her veins at 8 at night! Hehe. It could be just plain ole fatigue or mental exhaustion...whatever it is, it prevents us from consistent time with God.
And that prevents us from seeking Him at all.
We read about Zacchaeus' determination to see who Jesus was in Luke 19:1-10. He had the odds stacked against him - he was short, bless his heart, and surrounded by a huge crowd - but he climbed that ole tree to get him a view of the Lord passing by. How excitedly he must have run, to run ahead of the crowd and to climb a tree. He welcomed the Lord Jesus into his home gladly...and his life was changed radically as a result.
My circumstances as a stay-at-home mom of three young children are not favorable for consistent intimate times with God. But I can seize any opportunity, like Zacchaeus seized that tree, to see the Lord. It might be during a car ride (when all three are strapped down!). Or when I'm washing dishes. I hope to have some quiet time during the day, but I don't need to condemn myself for the circumstances that might prevent it. The point is to go deep, in that moment, with God. To run excitedly, to expect great things. Whenever it happens.
And really, our goal is not to "make the Lord part of our lives". He is our Life. To separate our "time" with Him from the rest of our lives is silly. It's impossible. Either He is or He is not my Life. There are those intimate moments, sweet and refreshing; I need those to thrive. But it's dangerous to think that those intimate moments will sustain my life. Those inconsistent intimate moments are framed in my ever-increasing faith and my obedience to God, according to His consistent mercy and grace. To Him be the glory!
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
3 vs. 1
This is the first time I'm participating in Gratituesday from the Heavenly Homemaker's blog.
Here goes:
I'm so thankful that Hubby took Sharkbait and SweetSong to a neighboring Air Force base this morning. Yes, that's a four-hour drive there and back. They'll be back around dinnertime. No, I don't know what he was thinking, but I'm still glad he did it :)
It was a nice, relaxing morning to be alone with Snuggie. She cracks me up! I'm working on colors with her (still). I read the cover of a book out loud: The Little RED Hen. I asked the Snugster: What color is the hen? She said: ORANGE. Alright, here's the cover of the book. The book is old. The colors are faded. The hen does look orange, doesn't she?
(Those are her wee toes to the left of The House that Jack Built. Standing on the coffee table? Tsk, tsk!)
The blue books are from Dolly Parton's Imagination Library thing. If you have kids under 5 and you live in TN, you can sign up at the library to receive one free book a month! Yee-haw!
When Snuggie brought one of the books over to the couch where I was waiting for her, I said, "Oh, your favorite!" She replied, pointing to herself with great vigor, "I [insert her name here]!!!" I guess she thought I had said, "You're Favorite", like it's a name.
I let her take one picture on the camera. Her first. This is me, sitting on the floor in the hallway. See?
Here goes:
I'm so thankful that Hubby took Sharkbait and SweetSong to a neighboring Air Force base this morning. Yes, that's a four-hour drive there and back. They'll be back around dinnertime. No, I don't know what he was thinking, but I'm still glad he did it :)
It was a nice, relaxing morning to be alone with Snuggie. She cracks me up! I'm working on colors with her (still). I read the cover of a book out loud: The Little RED Hen. I asked the Snugster: What color is the hen? She said: ORANGE. Alright, here's the cover of the book. The book is old. The colors are faded. The hen does look orange, doesn't she?
(Those are her wee toes to the left of The House that Jack Built. Standing on the coffee table? Tsk, tsk!)
The blue books are from Dolly Parton's Imagination Library thing. If you have kids under 5 and you live in TN, you can sign up at the library to receive one free book a month! Yee-haw!
When Snuggie brought one of the books over to the couch where I was waiting for her, I said, "Oh, your favorite!" She replied, pointing to herself with great vigor, "I [insert her name here]!!!" I guess she thought I had said, "You're Favorite", like it's a name.
I let her take one picture on the camera. Her first. This is me, sitting on the floor in the hallway. See?
Friday, February 26, 2010
Weekly Report, 2/22-26/10
The usual, the boring...but still posting because I want to keep accountable!
We actually did get to complete the morning routine W-F. Monday morning we went to the library for family reading time (though they are on holiday until next Monday; we just hung out with friends there). Tuesday we went to our church's moms' group. I consider our morning routine part of homeschooling :)
No speech therapy today for Sharkbait because his therapist is out.
Sharkbait: AWANA verse; Phonics - one pg daily (bl, sl, fl, gl, cl); he also read the monthly Baby Animals magazine from cover-to-cover for his sisters and me, not that it's complex or long or anything...
SweetSong: AWANA verse and review; she also had fun going to town in the bathroom with a spray bottle of vinegar, water, and washing soda and a few papertowels (random)
All three: lots of read alouds and preschool Bible song CD (over and over)
In other homeschooling news, I got to put my hands on and peruse at my leisure Mystery of History, Vol. I. I'm super interested in using this next year for first grade. I have Story of the World, Vol. I, but not the Activity Guide...I wonder if I had the AG, would that suffice? How do you choose? I like that MOH is overtly Christian. It also is re-usable, in the sense that each lesson has assignments for students in varying ages/grades. Does the SOTW AG have that, I wonder? Hmmmm....need to do a bit more research :)
I've been horrible with keeping up with Math. It was funny, though, when I gave the kids a bath this morning, Sharkbait kept on saying his math facts, though we've not officially taught them to him yet. 5 + 5 = 10; 3 + 3 = 6; etc. Funny! I answered some of the harder ones, like 11 + 11 :)
I suppose that's something we could review in the car...
That's about it!
We actually did get to complete the morning routine W-F. Monday morning we went to the library for family reading time (though they are on holiday until next Monday; we just hung out with friends there). Tuesday we went to our church's moms' group. I consider our morning routine part of homeschooling :)
No speech therapy today for Sharkbait because his therapist is out.
Sharkbait: AWANA verse; Phonics - one pg daily (bl, sl, fl, gl, cl); he also read the monthly Baby Animals magazine from cover-to-cover for his sisters and me, not that it's complex or long or anything...
SweetSong: AWANA verse and review; she also had fun going to town in the bathroom with a spray bottle of vinegar, water, and washing soda and a few papertowels (random)
All three: lots of read alouds and preschool Bible song CD (over and over)
In other homeschooling news, I got to put my hands on and peruse at my leisure Mystery of History, Vol. I. I'm super interested in using this next year for first grade. I have Story of the World, Vol. I, but not the Activity Guide...I wonder if I had the AG, would that suffice? How do you choose? I like that MOH is overtly Christian. It also is re-usable, in the sense that each lesson has assignments for students in varying ages/grades. Does the SOTW AG have that, I wonder? Hmmmm....need to do a bit more research :)
I've been horrible with keeping up with Math. It was funny, though, when I gave the kids a bath this morning, Sharkbait kept on saying his math facts, though we've not officially taught them to him yet. 5 + 5 = 10; 3 + 3 = 6; etc. Funny! I answered some of the harder ones, like 11 + 11 :)
I suppose that's something we could review in the car...
That's about it!
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Staging My Kitchen
I'm so taking a small break from relating my adoption story. It's so intense that I have to be mentally prepared to write...which I'm not today! But I am slightly, um, affected by the metal cleaner I used on my kitchen cabinet handles this morning, so I thought I'd post some before and after pics of my kitchen as I get ready to put the house on the market. 
I had already cleaned and replaced the cabinet handles by the time I thought of taking pictures, so there's no real "before" photo for this area. However, this is what the sink area usually looks like: a crock pot or rice cooker out, papertowels, canisters, my cordless handvac (which you can't see well), etc.
This is what the sink area looks like with cleaned handles and less clutter:
Another view:
Oy, I had put all the clutter on the kitchen table when taking these pics. When we actually have to show the house, though, most of this stuff should already be packed away in storage somewhere, including the red wok on top of the cabinets.
I don't think our cabinet handles have EVER been cleaned. Cleaned, they bring a whole new look to the kitchen!
Okay, so here's what this area looks like when it's cleaned up (which isn't typical, by the way). You can't see the handles very well, but these are ones I haven't cleaned up yet.
First question: When showing my house, should I have the coffee maker out, like the photo above or not, like the photo below?
I had already cleaned and replaced the cabinet handles by the time I thought of taking pictures, so there's no real "before" photo for this area. However, this is what the sink area usually looks like: a crock pot or rice cooker out, papertowels, canisters, my cordless handvac (which you can't see well), etc.
This is what the sink area looks like with cleaned handles and less clutter:
Another view:
Oy, I had put all the clutter on the kitchen table when taking these pics. When we actually have to show the house, though, most of this stuff should already be packed away in storage somewhere, including the red wok on top of the cabinets.
Phew, this is going to be a lot of work!
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
My Adoption Story - A Letter
For some reason, I feel this need to put my adoption story into writing...I need to describe for myself and for my family and friends what this thing is all about.
Here is how I found out about my birthfamily.
My mom and dad's adoption papers were falsified. My original papers state that my birthparents were 11 or so years apart in age and unmarried. An illegitimate child in Korea has little hope for a good future.
When I was a student in France for a semester, a Korean gentleman approached me at the church I attended with my host family. He asked me in French if I were American. Yes, I said, how did you know? (I expected the usual question: Where are you from? which is always loaded down with meaning.) I don't remember how he answered, but I went on to explain that I was adopted. His response surprised me. He expressed guilt and asked for pardon on behalf of all Korean people for putting me up for adoption. Whoa. Hello! I'm the most BLESSED person in the world! Why would you feel guilty for letting blessing happen to me? And I don't even know you! You do not know my birthparents! I was learning about the intense cultural ties Koreans maintain with one another. I like to say that after living in Europe for one year and Asia for two and a half, that I see Americans and Koreans as being the most ego-centric culturally. Americans almost always hang out with other American expats. The same with Koreans.
In fact, when I was in Albania on a short-term missions trip, I was approached by a group of Koreans encouraging me strongly to stay with them to celebrate the New Year. I had no clue who these people were and I was with my own group! Very surprising.
At any rate...
Over the rest of the semester the gentleman and I met at various times to talk. He offered to find out more about my birthfamily when he got back to Korea, as he was a professor of law in Seoul. I sent him my papers when I returned home and didn't hear from him for a long time. Then during Spring Break my senior year in college, I received a letter from the adoption agency.
***********
I just pulled out the letter. It's right here in front of me. I haven't looked at it in years...and now I see that the agency did indeed give me the names to my birthparents! Wow! All these years I had forgotten that...Maybe I just didn't want to process it...it's funny, though, because when I was living in Korea a few years after receiving this letter (which does, indeed, include an offer to help me find my birthparents!), I asked the agency for my family medical records, which they do not keep. They could only offer to put me on a list of adoptees looking for their birthfamilies. If the birthfamilies come looking for their children, then they can be matched up. But why didn't the agency do more for me, if they had already promised to do so in this letter, written a few years prior? I don't know. Maybe I don't really want to find my birthfamily.
The letter states that my birthfather was 33 years old and had a "meek and gentle personality". I guess he was "attractive". They also include his height (5'5"), which I find amusing. My birthmother, apparently, is 5'4" and has a "very docile personality and a sweet disposition". She was 32 (not 22) at the time of my birth. They were married, and had three daughters already.
The report my mom and dad received when they adopted me stated that my birthparents had "already signed the legal document to relinquish parental rights" at the time of my birth. Now this letter states that "according to the story given by the midwife [my] birthparents decided on an adoption plan due to their serious financial problems after [my] birthfather's business went bankrupt." I wonder when that happened...
Like I said, the birthparents' names are included in the letter! How in the world did I miss that??? And the letter ends with an offer to help with finding my birthfamily! How in the world did I miss that??? The woman who signed the letter is the same woman whom I emailed years later when I lived in country and asked for my medical history. Maybe if I had reminded her of this letter, more than getting my name on a list might have happened.
But would I have wanted something more to happen?
I've read/heard that most adoptees are content seeing pictures of their birthfamilies. Or that when they do meet the birthfamilies, due to language and cultural barriers, the biggest thing they get out of the experience is: whoa, it's weird meeting someone who looks like me. I have three children, and none really look like me. In fact, just the other day, someone commented on how different each child looks. The person went on to say that our son looks more like Hub. Hey, I wanted to protest, you should compare my 2-month pictures with my son's 2-month pictures. We look similar! But yes, he's always compared to Hubby...sigh.
When I lived in Korea and took the subway into or out of Seoul, where I was born, I would search the faces of my fellow passengers, looking for a woman who looked like me. Maybe she would be one of my sisters! I never did see anyone who looked similar.
I guess if I did meet my birthparents, I would try to assuage any guilt they might bear. I would convince them in the strongest terms I know that I grew up blessed, in a loving, Christian home. I would express my thanks to them for giving me a wonderful life in America. I would bring pictures of my happy childhood, of my dear family. I would hug them if they wanted, and listen to their words. Out of curiosity and a love of studying people, I would ask for their stories. How did you meet? What are your parents like? Did you have cravings when you were pregnant with me? Why did you give me up for adoption, again?
**********
Do I have a burning desire to meet my birthfamily?
No, not really.
But I would, if the opportunity presented itself.
I mean, why not? My story reads like a novel. I'm interested myself, in how it'll all turn out! Curiosity - that's why I'd meet them. Resolution? Reconciliation? Two big words, too big ideas. I'm not there. Yet.
Forgiveness is one thing when it's between you and God. It's another thing when you're face-to-face with the other person.
And like I said, I'm not there yet.
But now that I have names, I can pray for them. Yes, I can pray. The Lord calls me to pray, draws me to His heart to pray for my birthparents. That I can do.
Here is how I found out about my birthfamily.
My mom and dad's adoption papers were falsified. My original papers state that my birthparents were 11 or so years apart in age and unmarried. An illegitimate child in Korea has little hope for a good future.
When I was a student in France for a semester, a Korean gentleman approached me at the church I attended with my host family. He asked me in French if I were American. Yes, I said, how did you know? (I expected the usual question: Where are you from? which is always loaded down with meaning.) I don't remember how he answered, but I went on to explain that I was adopted. His response surprised me. He expressed guilt and asked for pardon on behalf of all Korean people for putting me up for adoption. Whoa. Hello! I'm the most BLESSED person in the world! Why would you feel guilty for letting blessing happen to me? And I don't even know you! You do not know my birthparents! I was learning about the intense cultural ties Koreans maintain with one another. I like to say that after living in Europe for one year and Asia for two and a half, that I see Americans and Koreans as being the most ego-centric culturally. Americans almost always hang out with other American expats. The same with Koreans.
In fact, when I was in Albania on a short-term missions trip, I was approached by a group of Koreans encouraging me strongly to stay with them to celebrate the New Year. I had no clue who these people were and I was with my own group! Very surprising.
At any rate...
Over the rest of the semester the gentleman and I met at various times to talk. He offered to find out more about my birthfamily when he got back to Korea, as he was a professor of law in Seoul. I sent him my papers when I returned home and didn't hear from him for a long time. Then during Spring Break my senior year in college, I received a letter from the adoption agency.
***********
I just pulled out the letter. It's right here in front of me. I haven't looked at it in years...and now I see that the agency did indeed give me the names to my birthparents! Wow! All these years I had forgotten that...Maybe I just didn't want to process it...it's funny, though, because when I was living in Korea a few years after receiving this letter (which does, indeed, include an offer to help me find my birthparents!), I asked the agency for my family medical records, which they do not keep. They could only offer to put me on a list of adoptees looking for their birthfamilies. If the birthfamilies come looking for their children, then they can be matched up. But why didn't the agency do more for me, if they had already promised to do so in this letter, written a few years prior? I don't know. Maybe I don't really want to find my birthfamily.
The letter states that my birthfather was 33 years old and had a "meek and gentle personality". I guess he was "attractive". They also include his height (5'5"), which I find amusing. My birthmother, apparently, is 5'4" and has a "very docile personality and a sweet disposition". She was 32 (not 22) at the time of my birth. They were married, and had three daughters already.
The report my mom and dad received when they adopted me stated that my birthparents had "already signed the legal document to relinquish parental rights" at the time of my birth. Now this letter states that "according to the story given by the midwife [my] birthparents decided on an adoption plan due to their serious financial problems after [my] birthfather's business went bankrupt." I wonder when that happened...
Like I said, the birthparents' names are included in the letter! How in the world did I miss that??? And the letter ends with an offer to help with finding my birthfamily! How in the world did I miss that??? The woman who signed the letter is the same woman whom I emailed years later when I lived in country and asked for my medical history. Maybe if I had reminded her of this letter, more than getting my name on a list might have happened.
But would I have wanted something more to happen?
I've read/heard that most adoptees are content seeing pictures of their birthfamilies. Or that when they do meet the birthfamilies, due to language and cultural barriers, the biggest thing they get out of the experience is: whoa, it's weird meeting someone who looks like me. I have three children, and none really look like me. In fact, just the other day, someone commented on how different each child looks. The person went on to say that our son looks more like Hub. Hey, I wanted to protest, you should compare my 2-month pictures with my son's 2-month pictures. We look similar! But yes, he's always compared to Hubby...sigh.
When I lived in Korea and took the subway into or out of Seoul, where I was born, I would search the faces of my fellow passengers, looking for a woman who looked like me. Maybe she would be one of my sisters! I never did see anyone who looked similar.
I guess if I did meet my birthparents, I would try to assuage any guilt they might bear. I would convince them in the strongest terms I know that I grew up blessed, in a loving, Christian home. I would express my thanks to them for giving me a wonderful life in America. I would bring pictures of my happy childhood, of my dear family. I would hug them if they wanted, and listen to their words. Out of curiosity and a love of studying people, I would ask for their stories. How did you meet? What are your parents like? Did you have cravings when you were pregnant with me? Why did you give me up for adoption, again?
**********
Do I have a burning desire to meet my birthfamily?
No, not really.
But I would, if the opportunity presented itself.
I mean, why not? My story reads like a novel. I'm interested myself, in how it'll all turn out! Curiosity - that's why I'd meet them. Resolution? Reconciliation? Two big words, too big ideas. I'm not there. Yet.
Forgiveness is one thing when it's between you and God. It's another thing when you're face-to-face with the other person.
And like I said, I'm not there yet.
But now that I have names, I can pray for them. Yes, I can pray. The Lord calls me to pray, draws me to His heart to pray for my birthparents. That I can do.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
My Adoption Story - Forgiveness
Last night I met a college student from Taiwan. She asked me this question I get often, in various forms. She chose to ask it this way: Do your children only speak English?
The underlying question is: Are you forsaking your ethnic culture? Sometimes it's asked in an accusatory tone; sometimes it's asked purely out of curiosity. But it inevitably comes up when I meet any Asian or Asian-American person.
My response was: yes, they only speak English, since that is the only language Hub and I speak fluently. The student also asked where I was from. Now, I know she's not looking for the "real" answer, which is: upstate New York. The answer she's looking for is: I was born in Korea and adopted as an infant. So, that's what I say. Then, I have to explain my hub's background: his parents are full Koreans, but he was born and raised in the States. I usually add that his family stopped speaking Korean to him and his sisters when he was four, so they would be ready for school, though his parents are both hard to understand when they speak in English!
I weakly tried to explain that I'm American, not Asian..but somehow the words just faded on my lips...the student gave a half-hearted nod, and we moved on to bigger and better topics, like the cuteness of my children, a fave topic of mine.
It's hard to explain, but if I'm Asian, then my next door neighbor is African!
Another Korean-American friend of mine explained to her mother that I was just "very Americanized". I had to correct her and say, I am not Americanized, I'm American! This, I believe, is the difference between the Korean-American and the Korean adoptee.
When asked on a questionnaire what ethnicity I am, I check the American/Caucasian block if it's a social/psychological-type survey; however, if it's a medical/physical survey, I check the Asian block.
And that is the extent of my Asian-ness.
**********
This morning I woke up extremely happy. It was spring-like outside; my hub had taken my kids to Dunkin' D's to pick up our traditional Sunday breakfast. They were due back any minute with the donuts, and I was just lying in bed, grateful for the sunshine streaming in my window.
I suddenly had a thought, brought on by the conversation I'd had with the student last night. It might have also stemmed from the World magazine articles I'd been reading lately about abortion. But I realized that my birthparents just might have loved me...They must have! Surely! I mean, I was the fourth girl, born into a culture that advocates 2 children, 3 max. (In fact, Hub's father told me half-jokingly, half-seriously that we couldn't have any more children!) But in Korea, it is customary to abort extra girl babies or any over the fourth child...I was both: the fourth girl. I had never thought about my birthparents in the light of love. My birthmother had to make the decision to go through with the pregnancy, probably with pressure from her parents and in-laws to abort. Korean parents pressure/harrass their children for many things. Hub's mom was harrassed by her in-laws for producing two girls and no boys. Good thing Hub was born shortly thereafter! The ironic thing, is, of course, that it's the man's contribution - the x or y chromosome - that determines the gender! But somehow it's the woman's fault!
Anyways, my birthmother decided to go through the labor and delivery, though she most likely knew she'd be giving me up immediately after. Maybe they were hoping for a boy? If I had been a boy, would they have kept me?
I met Hub in Korea (ironically enough; I'll share that story later). We married and got pregnant there, too! I had my ultrasound done at a Korean clinic and fully expected to find out the gender of our child, especially since our white American friends who had gone in right before us were told the gender of their baby. But the doctor refused to tell us the gender of ours. It's illegal to reveal the gender, she said, because so many parents abort girl babies. I started crying because I had to try to explain to her that Hub and I weren't Korean!!! You told our American friends!!! Why not us? She asked, semi-accusingly, why we would want to know. I don't remember how I answered; I just remember convincing her I was American and therefore had the right to know. She semi-relented and hinted at the baby being a boy.
I met a Korean woman at Bible study recently. Her family had moved to America when she was 16. She has 6 or 7 brothers; she's the only female born to the family. Her mom had been obsessive about having boys (from pressure from her mother) and resented her only daughter.
The gender issue is still very real in Korea.
But back to this morning:
I saw my birthparents in a new light. Though I may never meet them, I feel that I can forgive them.
Actually, a year or so ago, I prayed with Hub's sister, forgiving my birthparents. I believe at the moment, I let go. But I still have struggles, like last night, that will never stop popping up. Forgiveness is a one-time deal, in a sense, and in another sense, it's a recurring struggle, never to be fully resolved. Each time it recurs, I have to choose all over again. Either I will believe in the power of forgiveness and let go of bad thoughts or I will give in to sin and let bitterness grow in my heart toward my birthparents. It's tough and not cut-n-dried...
**********
Am I forsaking my ethnic culture?
No, it forsook me.
But maybe, just maybe, my birthparents didn't forsake me and did what they believed best for me, considering the pressures and contraints of the culture. (At any rate, I wouldn't have it any other way. I love the life God granted me!)
You know, I had never before separated my birthparents from my birth culture...another step toward forgiveness.
The underlying question is: Are you forsaking your ethnic culture? Sometimes it's asked in an accusatory tone; sometimes it's asked purely out of curiosity. But it inevitably comes up when I meet any Asian or Asian-American person.
My response was: yes, they only speak English, since that is the only language Hub and I speak fluently. The student also asked where I was from. Now, I know she's not looking for the "real" answer, which is: upstate New York. The answer she's looking for is: I was born in Korea and adopted as an infant. So, that's what I say. Then, I have to explain my hub's background: his parents are full Koreans, but he was born and raised in the States. I usually add that his family stopped speaking Korean to him and his sisters when he was four, so they would be ready for school, though his parents are both hard to understand when they speak in English!
I weakly tried to explain that I'm American, not Asian..but somehow the words just faded on my lips...the student gave a half-hearted nod, and we moved on to bigger and better topics, like the cuteness of my children, a fave topic of mine.
It's hard to explain, but if I'm Asian, then my next door neighbor is African!
Another Korean-American friend of mine explained to her mother that I was just "very Americanized". I had to correct her and say, I am not Americanized, I'm American! This, I believe, is the difference between the Korean-American and the Korean adoptee.
When asked on a questionnaire what ethnicity I am, I check the American/Caucasian block if it's a social/psychological-type survey; however, if it's a medical/physical survey, I check the Asian block.
And that is the extent of my Asian-ness.
**********
This morning I woke up extremely happy. It was spring-like outside; my hub had taken my kids to Dunkin' D's to pick up our traditional Sunday breakfast. They were due back any minute with the donuts, and I was just lying in bed, grateful for the sunshine streaming in my window.
I suddenly had a thought, brought on by the conversation I'd had with the student last night. It might have also stemmed from the World magazine articles I'd been reading lately about abortion. But I realized that my birthparents just might have loved me...They must have! Surely! I mean, I was the fourth girl, born into a culture that advocates 2 children, 3 max. (In fact, Hub's father told me half-jokingly, half-seriously that we couldn't have any more children!) But in Korea, it is customary to abort extra girl babies or any over the fourth child...I was both: the fourth girl. I had never thought about my birthparents in the light of love. My birthmother had to make the decision to go through with the pregnancy, probably with pressure from her parents and in-laws to abort. Korean parents pressure/harrass their children for many things. Hub's mom was harrassed by her in-laws for producing two girls and no boys. Good thing Hub was born shortly thereafter! The ironic thing, is, of course, that it's the man's contribution - the x or y chromosome - that determines the gender! But somehow it's the woman's fault!
Anyways, my birthmother decided to go through the labor and delivery, though she most likely knew she'd be giving me up immediately after. Maybe they were hoping for a boy? If I had been a boy, would they have kept me?
I met Hub in Korea (ironically enough; I'll share that story later). We married and got pregnant there, too! I had my ultrasound done at a Korean clinic and fully expected to find out the gender of our child, especially since our white American friends who had gone in right before us were told the gender of their baby. But the doctor refused to tell us the gender of ours. It's illegal to reveal the gender, she said, because so many parents abort girl babies. I started crying because I had to try to explain to her that Hub and I weren't Korean!!! You told our American friends!!! Why not us? She asked, semi-accusingly, why we would want to know. I don't remember how I answered; I just remember convincing her I was American and therefore had the right to know. She semi-relented and hinted at the baby being a boy.
I met a Korean woman at Bible study recently. Her family had moved to America when she was 16. She has 6 or 7 brothers; she's the only female born to the family. Her mom had been obsessive about having boys (from pressure from her mother) and resented her only daughter.
The gender issue is still very real in Korea.
But back to this morning:
I saw my birthparents in a new light. Though I may never meet them, I feel that I can forgive them.
Actually, a year or so ago, I prayed with Hub's sister, forgiving my birthparents. I believe at the moment, I let go. But I still have struggles, like last night, that will never stop popping up. Forgiveness is a one-time deal, in a sense, and in another sense, it's a recurring struggle, never to be fully resolved. Each time it recurs, I have to choose all over again. Either I will believe in the power of forgiveness and let go of bad thoughts or I will give in to sin and let bitterness grow in my heart toward my birthparents. It's tough and not cut-n-dried...
**********
Am I forsaking my ethnic culture?
No, it forsook me.
But maybe, just maybe, my birthparents didn't forsake me and did what they believed best for me, considering the pressures and contraints of the culture. (At any rate, I wouldn't have it any other way. I love the life God granted me!)
You know, I had never before separated my birthparents from my birth culture...another step toward forgiveness.
Friday, February 19, 2010
Weekly Report, 2/15-19/10
Hub was home Monday and Tuesday, so of course, nothing got done. Wednesday and Thursday were spent catching up on cleaning and regaining focus/sanity after the prolonged and crazy weekend!
W/Th/F - Phonics with Sharkbait
F - AWANA verses with Sharkbait and SweetSong (Sharkbait did copy his verse down. I called it his copywork!)
F - worked on morning routine, which I'm starting to think is crucial to setting up a good homeschool (well, at least for undisciplined mommies like me!)
That's about it! Thanks for stopping by :)
W/Th/F - Phonics with Sharkbait
F - AWANA verses with Sharkbait and SweetSong (Sharkbait did copy his verse down. I called it his copywork!)
F - worked on morning routine, which I'm starting to think is crucial to setting up a good homeschool (well, at least for undisciplined mommies like me!)
That's about it! Thanks for stopping by :)
How our AM Routine Went
First of all, yay to my two readers for giving input! Woo-hoo!
Rebecca, thank you for your time-tested advice to AVOID STRESSING OUT! This is so my goal: to change and progress, but not to be obsessed about or depressed by it (or lack of it). I so dig your idea of adding one responsibility and/or privilege at each birthday. Putting it in the birthday card is EVEN BETTER! That'll make it so super cool! I'm so going to do that!
R, thanks for commiserating with me :) I like the idea of a helper a day...that way, I could intro or try out different "chores" with each kid to find out what's doable...and get some quality time with each...maybe letting each help with meal prep when it's his/her day...just thinking out loud...lots of possibilities!
Well, I did follow the routine today, and it somehow brought more...peace (?) to our home...not that our home is not peaceful (ha!)...but there was this calm after we finished the routine...the kids calmly played by themselves until lunch! It was amazing! Okay, so there was only about an hour from the end of the routine to lunch, but still!
I cleared out the sink the night before. That does not mean I washed every dish, though :) I put what I could in the dishwasher and set the rest next to the sink to be washed this morning.
This AM hub was home for awhile, so he set out the kids' "first breakfast" (sorry, I'm reading the Lord of the Rings right now). I got up, drank my first cup o'joe, and took my time making eggs. The kids were at that point done with first bfast and the table looked it. While the eggs were cooking, I just took all books and crayons and toys off the table, leaving the dirty dishes for Snuggie. We ate leisurely and as they finished, they were allowed to leave and play. When all had finished, I called Snuggie to put all the dishes in the sink (after I had "organized" them and placed them at the edge of the table, ha!). When she was done, Sharkbait was up to wipe down the table. I was tempted to do it for him, but instead, just directed him crumb by crumb...he did fine, too. SweetSong loves using our cordless handvac! She vacuumed up around the table after I wiped up the sticky jelly from first breakfast, and voila! DONE!
We went through the rest of the routine...I simply called each one when I needed him/her, whether for brushing teeth or working on the AWANA verse.
I was glad we didn't go to speech therapy today (Sharkbait has a little cold). It allowed for a nice, leisurely morning that I feel was a success :)
But don't worry, I am not going to make this day the standard (that's just setting myself up for failure!). I'm just going to take it a day at a time. This resolve feels like freedom :)
Rebecca, thank you for your time-tested advice to AVOID STRESSING OUT! This is so my goal: to change and progress, but not to be obsessed about or depressed by it (or lack of it). I so dig your idea of adding one responsibility and/or privilege at each birthday. Putting it in the birthday card is EVEN BETTER! That'll make it so super cool! I'm so going to do that!
R, thanks for commiserating with me :) I like the idea of a helper a day...that way, I could intro or try out different "chores" with each kid to find out what's doable...and get some quality time with each...maybe letting each help with meal prep when it's his/her day...just thinking out loud...lots of possibilities!
Well, I did follow the routine today, and it somehow brought more...peace (?) to our home...not that our home is not peaceful (ha!)...but there was this calm after we finished the routine...the kids calmly played by themselves until lunch! It was amazing! Okay, so there was only about an hour from the end of the routine to lunch, but still!
I cleared out the sink the night before. That does not mean I washed every dish, though :) I put what I could in the dishwasher and set the rest next to the sink to be washed this morning.
This AM hub was home for awhile, so he set out the kids' "first breakfast" (sorry, I'm reading the Lord of the Rings right now). I got up, drank my first cup o'joe, and took my time making eggs. The kids were at that point done with first bfast and the table looked it. While the eggs were cooking, I just took all books and crayons and toys off the table, leaving the dirty dishes for Snuggie. We ate leisurely and as they finished, they were allowed to leave and play. When all had finished, I called Snuggie to put all the dishes in the sink (after I had "organized" them and placed them at the edge of the table, ha!). When she was done, Sharkbait was up to wipe down the table. I was tempted to do it for him, but instead, just directed him crumb by crumb...he did fine, too. SweetSong loves using our cordless handvac! She vacuumed up around the table after I wiped up the sticky jelly from first breakfast, and voila! DONE!
We went through the rest of the routine...I simply called each one when I needed him/her, whether for brushing teeth or working on the AWANA verse.
I was glad we didn't go to speech therapy today (Sharkbait has a little cold). It allowed for a nice, leisurely morning that I feel was a success :)
But don't worry, I am not going to make this day the standard (that's just setting myself up for failure!). I'm just going to take it a day at a time. This resolve feels like freedom :)
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Why the Morning Routine is NOT Working
I know why it's not working:
For starters, I cannot start my day without sitting in my glider rocking chair with a cup of creamy hot coffee. I have to sit there and not be disturbed until the caffeine has started its course throughout my limbs, reviving this still sleepy mommy. I cannot move until the first cup is completely gone.
That takes time.
By the time I am ready to start my day, the kids have already eaten the small breakfast I've set for them (typically toast or cereal), and are already coloring at the table, playing with toys in their bedrooms, or sitting on the couch "reading" books. Scattered. Like autumn leaves in the wind.
It's not easy to bring them back to the messy table for clean up time.
Even if I did get them to help, I have to micro-manage each step because they don't know how to do their chores. So, while I'm directing Snuggie to clear the table, so that it can be wiped down, the other two wander back to whatever they were doing before I called them. When Snuggie does attempt to put the dishes in the sink, I cringe, because the sink is still full from dishes from the night before! Don't let the breakfast dishes fall, little one! Here, just let me do it.
And that's just the first few events that are listed on our routine.
I know what I need to do:
1. At the very least, clear out the kitchen sink the night before, so that the breakfast dishes can be safely tossed in there the next day.
2. Have the kids practice their skills by directing them to clear and clean the dinner table, when I have Hub there to help.
3. Allow for playtimes while I finish my coffee. No way I'm giving that up!
4. Adjust my expectations. It'll take a while to teach myself and my kids how to do all these new tasks. Change my goal from perfection to progress.
5. Start tomorrow. I'm a perfectionist, and when things don't go "right" right away, I tend to label it a failure and hide from it until it bothers me so much that I have to think it through. That's where I'm at right now :)
If I don't start tomorrow, when will I?
If I don't post about it tomorrow, you (two readers) have permission to write something snarky, er, I mean, exhortation-like to *encourage* me in the right direction.
Sweet.
For starters, I cannot start my day without sitting in my glider rocking chair with a cup of creamy hot coffee. I have to sit there and not be disturbed until the caffeine has started its course throughout my limbs, reviving this still sleepy mommy. I cannot move until the first cup is completely gone.
That takes time.
By the time I am ready to start my day, the kids have already eaten the small breakfast I've set for them (typically toast or cereal), and are already coloring at the table, playing with toys in their bedrooms, or sitting on the couch "reading" books. Scattered. Like autumn leaves in the wind.
It's not easy to bring them back to the messy table for clean up time.
Even if I did get them to help, I have to micro-manage each step because they don't know how to do their chores. So, while I'm directing Snuggie to clear the table, so that it can be wiped down, the other two wander back to whatever they were doing before I called them. When Snuggie does attempt to put the dishes in the sink, I cringe, because the sink is still full from dishes from the night before! Don't let the breakfast dishes fall, little one! Here, just let me do it.
And that's just the first few events that are listed on our routine.
I know what I need to do:
1. At the very least, clear out the kitchen sink the night before, so that the breakfast dishes can be safely tossed in there the next day.
2. Have the kids practice their skills by directing them to clear and clean the dinner table, when I have Hub there to help.
3. Allow for playtimes while I finish my coffee. No way I'm giving that up!
4. Adjust my expectations. It'll take a while to teach myself and my kids how to do all these new tasks. Change my goal from perfection to progress.
5. Start tomorrow. I'm a perfectionist, and when things don't go "right" right away, I tend to label it a failure and hide from it until it bothers me so much that I have to think it through. That's where I'm at right now :)
If I don't start tomorrow, when will I?
If I don't post about it tomorrow, you (two readers) have permission to write something snarky, er, I mean, exhortation-like to *encourage* me in the right direction.
Sweet.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Is it tacky?
Is it tacky to reflect on Valentine's Day two days later?
Oh, well. I'm going to do it, anyways.
A week or so ago, I was actually shopping alone (woo-hoo!). I stopped at the PX and picked up some small Valentine's gifts for the kiddies. For the girls, I bought these little bracelets that were made in China. Is that love or what? The girls oohed and aahed, and wore their gifts to church.
For Sharkbait, I bought (of course), Nemo stickers. They ended up in a big sticker bunch by the end of the day, after being stuck and re-stuck to a clipboard, Sharkbait's face, and the wall...good thing I only spent a dollar on them.
For hub, I got one of those cards that makes music; he loves those. Like I said, he's musically-inclined. He speaks and thinks and feels in music, even when the music issues from cheesy cards from Walmart!
I asked for chocolate for Valentine's. I specified the kind, so I wouldn't get stuck with Russell Stover's again. I was happy :)
We babysat our friends' two children overnight, since the husband is deploying soon. We also invited over our friends with the three kids. And the little girl from across the street who comes to church with us. Yep, we spent our Valentine's night with two friends, nine children under the age of seven, and Settlers of Catan. It was GREAT!
This Valentine's, I have been reminded of the joy that comes from giving little gifts to my family that make them smile, even if the gift lasts no more than one day.
Oh, well. I'm going to do it, anyways.
A week or so ago, I was actually shopping alone (woo-hoo!). I stopped at the PX and picked up some small Valentine's gifts for the kiddies. For the girls, I bought these little bracelets that were made in China. Is that love or what? The girls oohed and aahed, and wore their gifts to church.
For Sharkbait, I bought (of course), Nemo stickers. They ended up in a big sticker bunch by the end of the day, after being stuck and re-stuck to a clipboard, Sharkbait's face, and the wall...good thing I only spent a dollar on them.
For hub, I got one of those cards that makes music; he loves those. Like I said, he's musically-inclined. He speaks and thinks and feels in music, even when the music issues from cheesy cards from Walmart!
I asked for chocolate for Valentine's. I specified the kind, so I wouldn't get stuck with Russell Stover's again. I was happy :)
We babysat our friends' two children overnight, since the husband is deploying soon. We also invited over our friends with the three kids. And the little girl from across the street who comes to church with us. Yep, we spent our Valentine's night with two friends, nine children under the age of seven, and Settlers of Catan. It was GREAT!
This Valentine's, I have been reminded of the joy that comes from giving little gifts to my family that make them smile, even if the gift lasts no more than one day.
I have learned that I love peace and quiet as much as I love a full house! (That's saying a lot, since I'm extremely extroverted! But really, nine kids? Under the age of seven? Five of them overnight? All I can say is: WE SURVIVED!!!)
I'm learning that love happens in the experiences, in the daily things, like bracelets and stickers and slumber parties. Tacky or not, reflecting on LOVE is always a good idea :)
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Snuggie
I just tagged all my posts and realized I have no posts featuring Snuggie! So, here is a bunch of my favorite pictures from her first year or so of life, though she's 2 1/2 now!
*Chunky monkey (one-month old)
* My favorite mommy-n-me
* My favorite mommy-n-me
*Tee-hee-hee!
*Baby Einstein!
*Always wanting to do what Big Bro and Sis do!
*Cutie pie fairy baby
Friday, February 12, 2010
Weekly Report, 2/8-12/10
Well, if nothing else, we've been having loads of fun reading picture books from the library. This week's books include Strega Nona by Tomie de Paola, Make Way for Ducklings by Robert McCloskey and Dory Story by Jerry Pallotta. I feel that the kids are actually starting to listen, starting to put the words that they hear into some sort of order...syncing them up with pictures painted on the page...starting to make sense of the plot...hopefully gaining appreciation for the beauty of the written and illustrated story!
Sharkbait has resigned himself to doing one phonics page with me :)
He learned the "-sh-", the "-ch-", and the "wh-" sounds.
AWANA was cancelled this week due to the "snow". I was so happy, though, that because of the new morning routine, we actually reviewed the verses daily this week!
Sharkbait has also become quite the artist. He draws scene upon scene from Finding Nemo, like this:
The picture in his book are of the moonfish and Marlin. Here's a closeup of his art:
And this is his interpretation of the angler fish (you can see the address written on the diver's mask worn by the fish), Dory and Marlin:
That's not anything I'd taught him; he just taught himself :)
Oh, well, I was, at any rate, quite impressed!
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
New Family Names
I'm inspired by Rebecca's quest to rename her family members for her blog (highmaintenanceaspirations). I used to use my kids' real names...then, I changed it to their first initials...makes it easier to type, I guess, but not that, um, interesting!
Therefore,
My son shall henceforth be called Sharkbait, after his obsession, sea creatures, and one of his favorite movie characters, Nemo.
And my younger daughter shall be called Snuggie, because she's snuggly. Incidently, I got a pink Snuggie for Christmas! (Please ignore her 80s looking hair. I have no clue what's up with that.)
Hmmm, I don't think I'll name hubby...but if I did name him, I'd dub him Soundbyte, or something like that, since he's musically inclined...
And me, I'm just *Sunny* :)
Therefore,
My son shall henceforth be called Sharkbait, after his obsession, sea creatures, and one of his favorite movie characters, Nemo.
My elder daughter shall be named SweetSong, because she has started singing praise songs with daddy playing on the guitar. I also caught her singing her own melody one day...something like "shine, shine, shine, shine, shine, like Jesus, like God"...very cute. Very goofy, too!
And my younger daughter shall be called Snuggie, because she's snuggly. Incidently, I got a pink Snuggie for Christmas! (Please ignore her 80s looking hair. I have no clue what's up with that.)
Hmmm, I don't think I'll name hubby...but if I did name him, I'd dub him Soundbyte, or something like that, since he's musically inclined...
And me, I'm just *Sunny* :)
Morning Routine
One advantage to J's Asperger's is that he thrives on routines. This is good because I do not. I made up a "bedtime routine" to help cut down on unnecessary bedtime whack-a-mole games (one kid pops out of bed, gets put back, next kid pops out, etc.). J holds us to the routine! He will cry if we try to put his pj's on before he brushes his teeth, or if we try to offer a sip of water before Bible time!
It's been so successful, in fact, that I've instituted a morning routine.
This is a lot harder to follow through on, though, because J is not 100% excited about it, mostly because I included *gasp* chores!!! He is responsible for wiping the breakfast table after H clears it and before V vacuums the floor around it. But I'm gonna stick to it!!! I'm determined!
Our morning routine:
*wake up.
*eat breakfast.
*clean up the kitchen (chores listed above).
*make bed.
*brush teeth.
*put on clothes (including shorts for J, since he doesn't like to wear them!).
*review AWANA verses.
Veteran moms have told me often step-by-step is the way to go, but like a fool, I keep on attempting to change the whole system in one fell swoop. I'm finding though *sigh*, that they're right. It's all about instituting change one step at a time...
We'll stick with the bedtime and morning routines for now. After we get settled in our new place, I'm going to do workboxes to bring routine to our school times.
:)
It's been so successful, in fact, that I've instituted a morning routine.
This is a lot harder to follow through on, though, because J is not 100% excited about it, mostly because I included *gasp* chores!!! He is responsible for wiping the breakfast table after H clears it and before V vacuums the floor around it. But I'm gonna stick to it!!! I'm determined!
Our morning routine:
*wake up.
*eat breakfast.
*clean up the kitchen (chores listed above).
*make bed.
*brush teeth.
*put on clothes (including shorts for J, since he doesn't like to wear them!).
*review AWANA verses.
Veteran moms have told me often step-by-step is the way to go, but like a fool, I keep on attempting to change the whole system in one fell swoop. I'm finding though *sigh*, that they're right. It's all about instituting change one step at a time...
We'll stick with the bedtime and morning routines for now. After we get settled in our new place, I'm going to do workboxes to bring routine to our school times.
:)
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Weekly Report, 1/18/10-1/22/10
Ever since finding out that we're moving in the summer, I find it difficult to stay focused on school. My thoughts constantly wander back to decluttering, home staging (to sell our house), and wondering what our new home will be like.
All that to say, it was only the basics that got done again this week. It might be that the basics are all that get done for the rest of the school year...
J-a phonics page a day
AWANA verse
T- AWANA verse
H- nothing
But I did pick up some great books from the library and have had good read aloud times with the kids this week. That's something in my book!
I'm also starting to think that workboxes would be good for us (after the move). I'm already planning it.
As you can see, I'm a planner more than a doer. Gotta get better at doing, I guess!
All that to say, it was only the basics that got done again this week. It might be that the basics are all that get done for the rest of the school year...
J-a phonics page a day
AWANA verse
T- AWANA verse
H- nothing
But I did pick up some great books from the library and have had good read aloud times with the kids this week. That's something in my book!
I'm also starting to think that workboxes would be good for us (after the move). I'm already planning it.
As you can see, I'm a planner more than a doer. Gotta get better at doing, I guess!
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Pink and Purple Picnic Party
V turned four this week. I enjoy the fourth year so much more than the second and the third! Here's to hoping it's a great year!
All in all, a great pink and purple picnic party :)
V wanted a pink and purple picnic party, so we invited several little girls over to make it happen :)
We got everything we needed at the dollar store and Walmart!
*Four pieces of fabric, which I hemmed, for the picnic cloths (what are they called?)
*A little heart-shaped basket for each gal, with a heart-shaped PB&J sandwich, cheesestring, dried fruit, and a disposable straw/sippy cup with pink lemonade (of course!)
*Craft: purple and pink chenille stems (aka pipe cleaners), tiny flowers, and ribbon = flower "garland"...the girls loved them!
*My mom is in town and made beautiful roses on the chocolate cupcakes. (V wanted "brown" cupcakes for her cake!)
As you can see, there was concern that H might blow out the birthday girl's candles before the song was done...
Friday, January 8, 2010
First-Ever Weekly Report, 1/4 - 1/8
J - Kindergarten
Navigating the Social World - Program 1: Recognizing a Simple Emotion
*made a scrapbook of people/things that make J happy to serve as a source for "redirecting negative thoughts to positive thoughts."
Phonics - short and long vowel review
Rod and Staff Grade 1 Reading - Lessons 1 through 4 on Creation
Copywork from R&S lessons
AWANA verse for week - Genesis 1:1
V- Pre-Kindergarten
AWANA verse for week - Psalm 33:4
Phonics - flashcards to learn letter sounds
H - Toddlerhood
Colors - flashcards
Phew, it doesn't sound like we did much, but it sure did feel like it :)
Navigating the Social World - Program 1: Recognizing a Simple Emotion
*made a scrapbook of people/things that make J happy to serve as a source for "redirecting negative thoughts to positive thoughts."
Phonics - short and long vowel review
Rod and Staff Grade 1 Reading - Lessons 1 through 4 on Creation
Copywork from R&S lessons
AWANA verse for week - Genesis 1:1
V- Pre-Kindergarten
AWANA verse for week - Psalm 33:4
Phonics - flashcards to learn letter sounds
H - Toddlerhood
Colors - flashcards
Phew, it doesn't sound like we did much, but it sure did feel like it :)
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