I know why it's not working:
For starters, I cannot start my day without sitting in my glider rocking chair with a cup of creamy hot coffee. I have to sit there and not be disturbed until the caffeine has started its course throughout my limbs, reviving this still sleepy mommy. I cannot move until the first cup is completely gone.
That takes time.
By the time I am ready to start my day, the kids have already eaten the small breakfast I've set for them (typically toast or cereal), and are already coloring at the table, playing with toys in their bedrooms, or sitting on the couch "reading" books. Scattered. Like autumn leaves in the wind.
It's not easy to bring them back to the messy table for clean up time.
Even if I did get them to help, I have to micro-manage each step because they don't know how to do their chores. So, while I'm directing Snuggie to clear the table, so that it can be wiped down, the other two wander back to whatever they were doing before I called them. When Snuggie does attempt to put the dishes in the sink, I cringe, because the sink is still full from dishes from the night before! Don't let the breakfast dishes fall, little one! Here, just let me do it.
And that's just the first few events that are listed on our routine.
I know what I need to do:
1. At the very least, clear out the kitchen sink the night before, so that the breakfast dishes can be safely tossed in there the next day.
2. Have the kids practice their skills by directing them to clear and clean the dinner table, when I have Hub there to help.
3. Allow for playtimes while I finish my coffee. No way I'm giving that up!
4. Adjust my expectations. It'll take a while to teach myself and my kids how to do all these new tasks. Change my goal from perfection to progress.
5. Start tomorrow. I'm a perfectionist, and when things don't go "right" right away, I tend to label it a failure and hide from it until it bothers me so much that I have to think it through. That's where I'm at right now :)
If I don't start tomorrow, when will I?
If I don't post about it tomorrow, you (two readers) have permission to write something snarky, er, I mean, exhortation-like to *encourage* me in the right direction.
Sweet.
2 comments:
When the girlies were the same ages as yours all they were responsible for was picking up their toys and books putting them in the baskets I lined the walls of their rooms with before nap and bedtime. That was it... it was all I could handle... anything else just made my job as "mommy" too hard. At five we added both one responsibility and one privilege. We even started a tradition of presenting these in a card on their birthday. Sparky is really looking forward to April when she gets her "curfew" meaning she will be allowed to be out in the evening without a family member with her, she won't even mind doing her own laundry too much... Remember a stress-out, frustrated mommy is never a good one...Both the girls are capable of clearing the dishes even though I didn't teach them how at three. Don't put too much pressure on yourself...
I can so relate to all of this. At the moment I can blame it on the fact that Mami works 3rd shift and is not able to fully train "micro manage" them. But I would be lying if I said that before starting this job that, "I had it together!" What I'm trying to do when I have the energy is to give each one of my kids there "day" or "days" to be the helper. This at our house will hopefully cut out some of the fights. If they have their own day to help they really can't complain that so and so is not doing their part. And it will be considered training as well. Just remember my kids ages are different. #5 I can so so relate to. Now I'm not OCD; I've given up on the whole having my house dress right dress after baby #1. But I'm weird. I hate baby steps but at the same time I have to do some things in order so I can go on to the next step. I can't even begin to explain. Just how weird am I??? My house can be a total train wreck but if I open my closets and they are clean and organized it gives me comfort.
I so agree with Rebecca especially the, "Don't put too much pressure on yourself.."
One last thing if your kids are into being on the computer take a look at www.handipoints.com it meant or not meant help, but worth a try!
Post a Comment